enquiries@jenpopkin.co.uk
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25
Sep

Online therapy – is it for me?

I admit it – as a counsellor who includes specialising in trauma therapy and attachment issues, I was very doubtful about providing support online. The technical side seemed to be a pain (it took me quite a while to get to grips with Zoom!) Now though, with several months of working with people using teleconferencing and/or the phone, I’m amazed at how well we can engage. We’re both so focused on the work, helping someone to deal with issues that can be either long-standing, or about an immediate crisis such as a recent road traffic accident.

Some of the positive reasons for having online counselling include:

  • Not having to travel – you can be down the road or on the other side of the world.
  • Being anonymous if the therapy is by phone.
  • Being in a familiar place such as your own home or an office room in your workplace.
  • Having comforting things with you such as a favourite cushion or cover.
  • Being able to have a cup of tea by your side!

So, what works? The first thing in getting to grips with the technical part is to spend a while setting up your room. There shouldn’t be any interruptions (ok – if your cat insists on walking in…) so family members need to be out of sight and out of hearing. If it is the first time that you have used online counselling, it might be helpful before starting therapy to google one of the many information sites that can help you to access Skype and Zoom. If you’re using a telephone, then headphones can let you move around a bit more easily.

Next, have a think about what you want to cover and how you might be feeling. What do you want from therapy? How would you like to be feeling if your problem is resolved? It can be useful to bring something to write with as a memory jogger for what you discover about yourself and the practical changes you might want to make between the counselling sessions.

No issue is unimportant – sometimes people say they are being ‘silly’ because well-meaning friends, partners or colleagues tell them this. Actually it is often because they don’t know how to support you, they are at a loss, as much as they want to help. Their default position can then be that it is something that you are doing ‘wrong.’ Their advice is more about themselves, what they would do if they were in your shoes. But of course, they aren’t you. The counselling session is there to help you make a space for your feelings, to acknowledge that they are valid, and then make changes that are right for you.

Last but not least, do give feedback on how you have found the session. Anything you didn’t like or what has been most helpful that you can use afterwards. Technology should be a tool. Whether you attend counselling in person (one day), online or on the telephone is to help you feel better in yourself.

3
May

Mediation Counselling

A Holistic approach to a difficult time

Frequently asked questions Read more

24
Oct

Coaching – Questions and Answers

Question: What is coaching?

Answer: Coaching is an educational approach where the ‘coachee’ is supported by the coach to reach their goals in their personal or working life. Read more

28
Jul

A Day in the Life of a Counsellor, Coach & Mediator

I start my day at 6.30 a.m. down the pool. I’m a bit bleary-eyed but I know the swim wakes me up! As a ‘treat’ I might have a lie in until 7 and do a half hour workout at home.
My work is sedentary and I need to keep fit and alert for clients, so exercise is important – also, I don’t want ‘therapist’s bottom!’ Then it’s breakfast, admin. which includes Read more

4
May

TRAUMA – The Hidden Wound

‘Time seemed to slow down’   ‘the worst part of it was I couldn’t help them’   ‘it was as if I’d floated up to the ceiling, looking down on what was happening to me’   ‘ I was frozen with fear’   ‘she said, after the accident, that I wasn’t the man she had married’  These are just some of the typical comments that people make when discussing their traumatic experiences. Read more

9
Mar

Clash or communicate?

‘Whenever we have a meeting, I feel he’s always putting me down!’
‘She’s over-emotional when I try to explain something!’

Sounds familiar? We often put such comments down to a ‘personality clash’ and feel helpless, nothing can be done about it except to have as little as possible to do with the other person. They’re ‘just an awkward customer.’ However, something can be done about difficult Read more

30
Jan

EMDR and Supporting Traumatised Clients

I have been a counsellor for over thirty years and during that time I have sustained my interest in helping people who have been traumatised. My work has included supporting family members where there has been a homicide, counselling adults abused as children for the NSPCC and clients referred by their insurance companies for personal injury claims. Read more

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